E May: Greens “Meaningless”

Elizabeth May, the Leader of the Green Party of Canada has said at the BGM Convention that the 25% decline in the membership numbers are a “meaningless indicator”. Since the members are the party–she just said that the members don’t count.

Let’s say, hypothetically, that you have two political parties:  Party A has 100,000 members, Party B has 1,000 members.  According to Elizabeth May, Party B is just as likely to win an election, raise money, recruit volunteers, etc.   Wow.

Oh but it gets better….

Elizabeth May wants the “meaningless indicator”–membership–to be six times higher at 50,000… “But it’s not my role as leader to work on that.”  You’re right–it’s Sharon Labchuk’s and she is awful at it and has been awful at it for four years. Please change this.

Elizabeth also says that she would do “a lot” of things differently in the next election.  Like what?  Lie more? Greens and ex-Greens want a Leadership contest specifically because Elizabeth won’t do anything differently.  She keeps making he same rookie mistakes over and over, and anytime someone suggests a new idea they are pushed out because E May and her “friends” are too insecure to take any criticism.

May said getting elected was “top priority” for her… now.  “Up until after the 2008 election was over it had not even been on a list of priorities that the leader getting elected had any particular importance.”  : O Wh–wha–WHAT!?  Oh I see–Elizabeth forgot to try to win last time–just a small error–no big deal–but she’ll win this time…  What was the London North Center by-election about then?  I could have sworn that the goal was to get Elizabeth elected… Was Central Nova a practice run?…

How can anyone still support Elizabeth May?

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Liar, Liar, The Green Party Is On Fire

This past week, several articles have appeared in the media regarding the potential race for the Leadership of the Green Party of Canada being defeated by the membership in recent voting.  The information is false.

The motion calling for a leadership race to commence before October 31 has not been defeated, despite Elizabeth’s claims that it has been defeated.  This is not a matter of opinion or perspective.  The fact is, if 51% vote at the BGM in favor of having a leadership race–the race will be on.  (There are no conflicting motions)

Elizabeth knows the information she gave the media is false.  Most people call that a lie… and real Greens dislike politicians that lie to Canadians.  Maybe this is why Elizabeth May only has the “overwhelming” support of only 12% of the Party, despite suggesting that 85% of the entire Party supports her (another lie).

Elizabeth May is trying to discourage those that disagree with her incompetence and dishonesty from showing up at the BGM to vote for a leadership race, by telling the members that there will be no leadership race–which is exactly why we need one.

Why is Elizabeth lying so much in communications regarding a leadership race?  E May is attempting to stop Sylvie Lemieux or other potential Leadership Candidates from organizing any rival campaigns.  Dishonesty is the worst type of hyper-partisan tactic.

This began when Elizabeth violated the Privacy Act and messaged the entire membership with a personal e-mail filled with misinformation, without giving those with similar or opposing resolutions to send their own message.  This underhanded self-serving manipulation is unacceptable to members, supporters and voters.

Look at this recent example from E May’s blog, “We debate openly and that is why we are growing — and growing.”  Huh?  Debate “openly”?  Why was I (and others) banned from the GPC blogs two years ago for debating the problems the party was having–and still has–in organizing?  Open debate would allow Sylvie Lemieux to message the membership with her own views on the motion the way Elizabeth did…

And since when have we been growing?  lmao!  Fact: The GPC is losing members.  Fact: The GPC is losing EDAs.  Many Candidates and Councillors have quit because of E May.  Support has been stagnant for two years while the Green movement has boomed.  We haven’t grown because of problems I was banned for trying to change with open debate–the same open debate that Elizabeth and her supporters attempt to discourage.

Elizabeth was elected for a two year term.  She has been Leader without a review or leadership race since 2006.  It is clear from the e-mails I have received and the blogs I have read that the vast majority are no longer supportive of Elizabeth May or her tactics.  If the supporters of Elizabeth believe she has the support of the membership–prove it–ask Elizabeth May to start the leadership race now.  Leadership races are always good for any party.  The fact that E May disagrees is all the evidence anyone needs–she believes she will lose.

Elizabeth doesn’t have to resign to run for Leader as she has dishonestly claims–but she should. Elizabeth, please, put the interests of the Green Party before your own ambition, and resign as Leader immediately, before Canadians begin to think that all Greens are so unscrupulous.

For the small minority who still say I am hurting the party, please remember that I did not publicly criticize any Greens that ran for office until now, but lies are unacceptable.  My original criticisms were of the organizing of the Party.  If only Elizabeth had listened…

And to anyone that still supports Elizabeth as Leader, leave a comment and tell us why you think she should be allowed to lie to the membership, the media and the country…

Update: As of April 7, 2011 most of these links are taken down or hidden.  It appears that the Green Party is ashamed of its conduct.  I’m not.  I’m still speaking truth.

Always Truth

I have been accused on more than one occassion of “hurting the Green Party” by criticizing some of the members or employees. To make that claim, one must ignore the facts I present and defend incompetence and dishonesty. Incompetence and dishonesty is what hurts the Party–not trying to correct it. I feel vindicated by the fact that so many are messaging me in agreement.

Speaking the truth is never a bad thing. Only those that stand to lose personnally–like losing a paycheck–need to resort to lies and manipulation to silence those that disagree.

If the Green Party wants to be different, then it needs to act different. Elizabeth May only talks different–which is the same.

The End of the Green Party?

To the past and present members of Green Party of Canada,

I write to you out of great concern.  Without your urgent response, by Monday, the Green Party of Canada may be forever defeated.  Please continue reading to find out how you can help.

Two motions have been brought forth concerning the next General Meeting, specifically about the Constitutionally mandated GPC Leadership contest that must occur in 2010.

A leadership contest is a great way to build the party by recruiting new members and talented volunteers. It puts the spotlight on Green policies and politicians.  It is a good thing for the Party and the green movement.

Elizabeth May is scared of losing her job, and she is trying to stop any Leadership contest scheduled for 2010.  Some are calling one motion a “Leader for life” motion, which would be more accurately called a “leader for death” motion, since it would be the end of many Green’s dreams for democracy–the end of the Green Party in Canada.

FACT: Elizabeth May lied to the membership when she broke the GPC Constitution and the Privacy Act by using the GPC membership lists to send a dishonest personal e-mail regarding two convention resolutions, for her own personal gain.  She had no right to send this e-mail to all members without giving equal opportunity to those that opposed her views on those motions.

The entire e-mail is in reference to motions that personally effect Elizabeth’s job–her power.  She opposes “erod(ing) the Leadership”–so does Stephen Harper.  The e-mail states that she would have to resign if we had a leadership contest–which is absolutely false.  Nothing requires the Leader to step down during a Leadership race.  The issue is whether members have the right to vote on who is best to lead the party from now on.

E May’s e-mail also claims her campaign is going well.  Elizabeth has laid off most of the Organizers across the country and re-tasked the remaining Organizers to her campaign.  As a result, the Green Party of Canada’s membership levels are at historic lows–7900–a loss of over 25%.  Elizabeth May has spent well over $275,000 in Saanich – Gulf Islands and has only signed up 26 new members.  Elizabeth May cannot win if she cannot inspire more than two dozen to become members and volunteers.

The real problem is more that so many quit.  Most of the Greens I have gotten to know in the last four yeas are ex-members–specifically because of the actions of Elizabeth May–actions just like her e-mail, which are partisan and self-serving.

Elizabeth also dishonestly claims that polls show we may elect four Green MP’s.  Which riding-by-riding polls show that, Elizabeth? None.  Its a lie.  If E May thinks we will elect four MP’s in the next election, she needs to tell us what has changed.  We have heard this promise many times before.  If the same people keep doing the same things, the results are likely to be the same.  All evidence points to another failure in SGI.

Elizabeth’s organizational problems are not new.   The Vancouver Center campaign was called the “best chance to elect a Green in Canada” by Elizabeth May and her core team.  Deputy Leader Adriane Carr finished in last place after also spending huge resources.

I saw Adrian Carr’s campaign in Vancouver Center.  It was a handful of people spending buckets of money hiring their expert friends that never performed.  New ideas weren’t tolerated.  There was lots of talk about bad politicians, bad parties, bad corporations, but no one had a clue how to achieve real results, and a year after Elizabeth and her clique took over the party, the countrywide progress and growth seen under Jim Harris ended.  This is a direct result of the Leadership of Elizabeth May.

If you are a current GPC member and want to see our best have a chance to contribute, if you want your voice to count, if you still want to save the world… please vote this Saturday or Sunday against the motion to cancel the Leadership Contest, and vote for the motion upholding the Constitution.

To any that still support Elizabeth, despite the overwhelming evidence of her total failure and dishonesty, please vote for her during the scheduled Leadership contest and allow those that disagree to vote for someone who can make a real difference–not just talk about doing it.

When you cast your vote for the next Leader, I hope it is for someone who would make it a criminal offense for politicians to lie like Elizabeth May did.

Daniel Mick

thequantumbuddha@hotmail.com

G20 Questions: The Criminalization of Dissent

Montebello 2007:  Police dress up in black as protesters and throw rocks at the Police injuring a protester.  They are caught and it makes international news.  But nothing happens to them or their bosses or the politicians that ordered it.  There is no public inquiry–no accountability.  Apparently it is legal to start a riot for political purposes as long as you are an agent of the government…

June 2010:  Marc Emery sits in jail–extradited to the USA for his political beliefs by Stephen Harper and Rob Nicholson.  Jacob Hunter is assaulted by police outside the Justice Ministers constituency office.  Somehow the police claim that Jacob assaulted the police…  There’s video proving otherwise (check out the 5 minute mark).  How are the charges still being pursued?  How is the officer still employed?  Why did the police respond at all? and why so quick?  As a security guard that has worked on movie sets all over the Greater Vancouver area, I have called 9-1-1 many times.  Usually it takes a very long time for police to respond even for an assault–especially in poor areas.  I once called the police from Shaunesy (one of the richest neighborhoods in the country) and three police cars came within a couple minutes… But this lightning response to no crime or threat takes the cake.

And about the idea that Jacob Hunter’s camera is a weapon–you bet it is! (just not a violent one : D ).  If Jacob Hunter’s cell phone was a weapon, or the officer felt threatened by it or Hunter, then he shouldn’t have turned his back on him.  The officer should have dealt with the threat immediately, the fact that he didn’t proves that the officer was just looking for a technicality to arrest the protesters.  That isn’t policing–its politicking.

2010: Stephen Harper announces a plan to remove billions in spending from programs that reduce crime–like education, welfare, medicine–and spend it instead on prisons and enforcement of laws that only affect those that vote for parties other than the Conservatives…  The more crime–the greater the fear of crime or anger about crime (thanks to the corporate funded media)–the more votes for the corporate agenda… Sad isn’t it?

G8 Toronto 2010:

Border patrol stops people from entering Canada because of their political beliefs.
Police, with a billion dollar budget round up thousands of innocent political protesters, and illegally search anyone they please.  The police outnumber the protesters by 2-1 in many areas.
Groups of protesters are arbitrarily charged at and attacked without warning or provocation by the police.  There was no reason to move them–no justification for an action that may lead to the injury of a police officer, protester or bystander.  This wasn’t about safety and security or law and order…

Police surround peaceful protesters that are singing the national anthem, and pepper-spray and beat these innocent people and then arrest then for being where they are–even though the police won’t let them leave–and they have every right to be there and protest peacefully.

Anyone with a camera is targeted and pushed away to hide the actions of the police.  Unmarked vans pull up and throw random people in the back kicking and screaming and speed off–like something out of a movie about resistance to a violent military regime… Like Burma in 2007.

A small group dressed in black with a media friendly name the “Black Bloc” rampages through the Toronto without any police response whatsoever–in fact the police stand by as the riot starts–then retreat to let it happen.  Remember, the police outnumber the protesters by 2-1 in many areas…  Many cameras get close but the police somehow cannot–or will not…
The rioters have no cause, no message, no strategy–they aren’t protesting–just destroying things for the TV cameras.  All over the world people are thinking what a bunch of lunatics and radicals the protesters are (all of them).  The only political movement that benefits from this violence is Stephen Harper’s corporate conservatism…

The rioters go to the “free speech” zone (the whole country) and take off their masks and dark clothes and just walk away.  Other videos show plain clothes people under the protection of the police, beating protesters with their batons.  Why do the rioters never get identified or charged, but the peaceful protesters get attacked and beaten? Hmmm…

With Stephen Harper and the media so eager to save the country from terrorists and evil-doers, why have they not labeled the Black Bloc “terrorists”?  I guess Harper only disagrees with terrorism when the terrorists are brown… or maybe they’re not terrorists–but cops?

The media ignores the peaceful protest and the reasons for it–like always.  Why is the story always about violence?  Why doesn’t the media report on what is going on?  There is obviously lots of interest.  There is obviously lots at stake if the G8/20 meetings need such high security that we will suspend the rights of all Canadians to host it.  So why not cover the issues instead of “violent protests”?

Stories begin to break through alternative and social media.  The reliance on the internet is what the corporatists want.  They own the system.  President Obama just signed into the law the right to shut down the internet–shut down dissent.  This is full scale political war–and we’re losing.

The police were quoting phony laws–lying to people to violate their rights.  And what happened to anyone who called there bluff?  They were arrested for disobeying a lawful order (which wasn’t lawful)–or trespassing (even though they weren’t)–or resisting arrest (which couldn’t be a lawful arrest) for breaching the peace before it was breached (cause cops have time machines).

The really disturbing part is that there is no defense against the police making up laws.  How can a citizen assert that they have knowledge to the contrary about a made-up law?   The police now have claimed the right to tell you to do anything and force you to comply with every order they make…  Shouldn’t a single instance of an officer making up a law and infringing upon the rights of protesters be enough to end that officer’s career for good?  How can this be perpetrated on us all by those that claim to serve and protect us?

The police are literally making their own laws in Canada.  This is unconstitutional–the people make the laws through our local representatives.  The actions of the police are criminal.  Even rape was threatened…

Flashback Vancouver 2009:  A man is killed by police.  It is caught on camera.  The phone is seized and an officer erases the evidence of his crime. Without the video, no wrong doing can be proven.

Robert Dziekański:  If it wasn’t for the video that proved each officer involved was a liar, most Canadians would have believed that four heavily armed cops were threatened by a stapler.  Remember how the police refused to release the video of their crime and the photographer had to get a court order?  Remember how at first the “thorough and complete” investigation showed the officers “acted within the law in the performance of their duties”? even though the video clearly shows, if you don’t know the context, what looks like a man being executed in seconds.  Thank G_d all four “bad apples” happened to be on duty in the same place and at the same time…

Two Vancouver City police officers show up at a man’s house, drag him onto the lawn and severely beat him.  The man could have easily died.  The only reason this often repeated story makes news is that the police got the wrong guy–the police were supposed to beat the man in the basement suite.  If they had got the right guy they would have claimed he resisted arrest and the officers would never be disciplined or even suspected of wrongdoing because we all know cops follow the law–they’re the “good guys”, and of course the good guys should be rough with the bad guys–especially before they are proven guilty of anything in a court of law.
A choice is before us all.  This is either the end of political freedom in Canada, or the beginning of the end of Stephen Harper’s corporate agenda.  This isn’t a false alarm.  This is the full scale criminalization of political dissent and it must be stopped before we lose the right to protest–or disagree–altogether.

We must push Stephen Harper back across the border and begin a public inquiry into the attempts by these forces to alter the laws and culture of Canada, to turn citizens into captive customers that can be rounded up at will for being one of the 70% of Canadians that doesn’t share Stephen Harper’s backwards, oppressive views.

But all of this is a logical argument, and unfortunately most people make emotional decisions and only use logic to justify those decisions to their egos or peers.  Just click on the videos again and tell me: who are the good guys and who are the bad guys?  Especially watch this one.

Who’s side are you on?  The side of Canadians–or corporations?  The police–or the law?

Is this Love?

So here I am–in high school 1998. North Surrey.  Wow, I feel like chanting “Let’s Go Spartans!”

As I approached graduation I was at a loss as what I should do with my life.  I didn’t know who I was or what I wanted.

I went to school.  That is what I did.  I was a student.  That’s what I was.  I had classmates that I called friends.  I had a car and people liked that.  McDonald’s wasn’t across the street back then.

And it was all coming to an end…

Now I had to choose the rest of my life.  What would I do.  Who would I be?  Wait… If I’m not going to be a student in a bit, then I am not really a student now…then who am I?…

Oh shit.

To many, we are our jobs.  If you’re a doctor, you’re no longer a Mr. or Ms. or Mrs.–you’re Dr. Somebody.  Well I didn’t know what to do.  I didn’t like school other than it was entertaining.  I didn’t do homework very often–or classwork.  I did very well on tests and usually managed to stay on the Honor Roll without much effort so university was technically an option–eventually.  But for what?  I was lost.  The last thing I needed to do was dart off at full speed in a random direction like Forrest fucking Gump.

I didn’t have a single friend at graduation.  I didn’t go to grad with anybody.  I didn’t meet up with my friends and take a limo.  Graduation solidified groups.  I was an outsider.  I was never really part of any group–ever.  I drifted.  I wasn’t cool.  I wasn’t ‘alternative” or grunge, or in the school band.  I didn’t dress any way.  It was pre-emo.

I ended up getting a job at a sawmill.  No they don’t make saws.  They cut wood.  It made good money–almost $40,000 in my first year.  I bought a black Mustang.  I had money in the bank.  RRSPs.  Great credit.  I wasn’t a loser.  I found a private college that taught custom audio and video and went to school for $200 an hour.

Since I was a child I have used music as an escape.  I remember sitting on the floor with a set of huge headphones on blasting Michael Jackson.  Before long, boredom and curiosity led me to take apart my speakers and modify them.  Now I could get paid to do it.

I sort of invented a new way to chop light wood faster–way faster–like adding one more guy to a three man crew.  It was tough but we cut lots and made lots of CHA CHING!.  I got injured from overwork–tendonitis.  Instead of compo they put me on modified duties.

The barcode gun weighed ten pounds and holding it up in the air with the same uninjured hand all day, every day, meant now I had tendonitis in my wrist too.  So I was fired.  It was illegal but I didn’t fight it cause I had just graduated from my college and was ready to take on the world.

The world was more than up for the challenge.

I couldn’t find a job for months.  The best I could find was $10 an hour using my own vehicle going from Langley to Vancouver.  And the company I worked for as going to bill me out at $110 an hour.  No thanks.

So I went into sales, instead.  My second month I was top in the store.  One day a woman and her daughter came in to buy a TV.  I sold them the warranty.  At the till, she caught that I didn’t tell her all the fine print about the warranty.  I gave her a bigger discount.  I was never a good “salesman” after that.  I started telling people all the details.  I started serving them instead of trying to empty their wallet or bury them in debt.  My numbers began to suck.

Just then I found a job doing custom work for $32,000 a year starting salary.  Diploma, started on my career, upgrading at BCIT, nice car–not bad for a 21 year old.  I was ecstatic–for two weeks, when I found out…

My boss was an idiot.  A monotone slow-talker.  He began as a subcontractor and then was hired as a jack-of-all-trades type to takeover the integration side of the business full time.  Now he had a whole team of real sales people behind him and he was way over his head within weeks with no management or organizational skills.  I’m a perfectionist–he’s the opposite.  We butted heads.  He had huge gaps in his knowledge.  I had gaps in mine.  We couldn’t work it out because he refused to believe he had gaps and refused to help fill mine.

The department did horrible.  He hired his friend to work with me but it was clear from early on that he was above me.  As an ex-alarm installer, he knew more about cutting holes and running wires.  I knew more about audio, video, sales, programming–the difficult stuff–cause I went to school for it, so of course I did all the brainless work, while the new guy got training to do things I already knew how to do, but wasn’t allowed to do.

Then another guy was hired above me, but at least he was brilliant–a true professional from Bombardier.  It didn’t last long, though.  When our parent company, that claimed to be 10 times bigger than any competitor, was found to be cooking the books and the stock dropped from $75.00 to $0.01, of course it was he who was laid off–not the idiot or his friend.

I quit and went back to my last job but with a promotion.  Now 21, I was a sales/assistant Manager at an electronics retailers new Vancouver Store, with a staff of 11.  Now I could teach others, increase professionalism and I wouldn’t have to hose anybody.

Between the time I took the job, an started the job, the advertising budget was slashed in favor of other markets (Alberta).  Sales are ad driven.  It hurt.  The 11 page Boxing Day flyer shrunk to one page.  My boss argued it back up to four.

My boss quit.  The new guy brought in his own new guys.  I was demoted.  I quit.

I applied at a high end retailer that also did service and custom work.  They didn’t have a job for me in custom, but they liked me so much they gave me a great salary and put me in another department until a position in custom opened up just to keep me away from the competition.  I felt great.  Even though I had bad luck, I felt valued.

After six months or so, business tanked.  Ever since I entered the workforce the industry was in decline.  Guys in white vans were slashing rates and quality standards, the internet or a big box stores would always sell it cheaper.  Twenty five people were laid off.  Since I wasn’t even in the right department I was one of them.

wtf?  Why does this keep happening to me?…

I went to another high end retailer where I could sell and essentially start my own integration/custom department.  It was a shaky start, business for them was down as well.  But I made a few real big sales in a short period–including one to a large international construction company : ) over that premier company that offered me $10 an hour a few years ago : D  I was on CBC radio as an industry expert on a show about how product quality is getting shittier and shittier in the rush to make everything cheaper.  I made it.  There was a tough patch but I fucking made it.   For a few weeks…

The installer I had–a subcontractor–was awful.  Incompetent and insubordinate.  Beyond tardy.  I sold a system to a few local actors that were a couple.  The installer missed the install day twice.  Just never showed up.  He was also trying to take my customers from me.

I wasn’t allowed to fire him or use anyone else.  I found a better guy that went to the same college as me but he wasn’t hired.  My boss blamed me for the jobs not going well.  He thought that if the installer could put in a few speaker for him, then he should be able to handle an integrated $40,000 public use theatre system and three others like it simultaneously.  It was too much work for a competent team, let alone that useless jackass.  I was told to do the installs myself–for free.

I think I fucked up here.  I should have quit and started my own business with my buddy I tried to have hired.  I didn’t have the money though and I would need to shell out a bunch of cash for tools, a van, advertising, product, etc.  I didn’t have the money because I couldn’t get anything to work for long enough to save and had a fiance that didn’t like working but loved spending money.

I went to work at the company my Dad worked for instead, selling document solutions.  I was hired over people with 2 year marketing certificates.  He told me I would get the support there that I wasn’t getting at my current job…

I got engaged.  I was 24 now and we had lived together for three years.  We had been waiting and would continue to wait to get married… because of money.

On my forth day at my new job, my Manager was fired.  He wasn’t replaced.

I barely knew how to work a fax machine and now I had to learn everything about networks, industrial duplicators, and a bunch of shit I never learned enough about to tell you what it did–on my own.  Without any product training I sold almost nothing.  After almost three months I went to the President and asked for a manager to train me.   He fired me for “wasting (his) time”.

I’d had it.  Fucking had it.  Sick of working shit jobs for shit people, with only a few exceptions.

This just didn’t make sense to me.  What more did I need to do?  Why is this happening to me?  Why am I not allowed to succeed?  Why?  What purpose does this serve?  WTF?

I was depressed I guess, I don’t remember much.  I started smoking more pot.  I went on disability for depression.  I went on every medication in the world.  Some how the pills didn’t change my life or my outlook on it.

There is no purpose.  None at all.  Its just chaos.

There can’t be any purpose because if there was, then I would need to come up with a reason for the bullshit I went through–from birth.  Maybe this is hell?  Purgatory?  Maybe I am meant to do something other than sell stereos?

I started writing.  It was therapeutic.  It gave me something to do.

After a while, I began to feel better.  But I was still totally fucked.  I hadn’t worked in years now and that’s like putting a swastika on your resume.  People told me to lie.  I don’t want to live in a world where I have to lie.

My relationship ended.  We didn’t have enough money to get married.  Though she only made $10 an hour, she saw it as I didn’t have enough money.

I needed a miracle.  One came eventually.  I got my Teamster membership doing security.  I worked my ass off.  I carved out a niche.  I paid off debt.  I got a nice place.  I bought new clothes.  I had a nice vehicle.  This was just a few months ago.  I was finally able to date seriously.  I could show I had the basics and could provide well.  I had a future.  I could afford a wife.  I wasn’t a loser.  Still totally emotionally messed up–but not poor.  It took years to get there.  It lasted for two months…

Then I got a letter in the mail telling me I can’t work because of a bullshit discriminatory interpretation of a old ruling told me I didn’t get in the union soon enough, and now I have to wait and be one of the last hired.  Read: huge pay cut.  The goal I’ve been working on for a decade–a normal life–gone… again.

I am no different than before the letter, but once it was written I became a loser.   But how can that be if I didn’t change?  What did change?

People’s perception of me changes with my economic status.  I should have made $60,000 this year.  I’ll make $30,000 now and I don’t have the resume to expect more.  My net worth is zero.  Fun things cost money.  We all want to have a good time.

“When at first you don’t succeed, Try and try again!”

How many times?

“Get back on the horse!”

Do all horses breathe fire?

“YOU CAN DO IT!!”

Fuck off

“I just want to meet a nice (rich) guy”

… I know…

I should have gone to university, but I didn’t want the debt.  I guess I’ll go now.  I am at least five years from getting back to the point I can date seriously again.  Five years.  Its like a prison sentence.  But what did I do wrong?

It would be easier to struggle if I wasn’t struggling alone.  I feel like a marathon runner that has been running for 30 years, that’s getting laughed at by people in their cars for being too slow.

I’d like to see how well you’d run in my shoes.

I’m sick of being judged by people.  I’m sorry for not being born rich.  I’m sorry my parents couldn’t give me the tools to thrive in this world.  I’m sorry school costs so much.  I’m sorry there are no deer to hunt, Honey, but don’t take it out on me.  Stand by me.  Hunt with me.  Show me you are willing to sacrifice for our children.  If you’re just going to sit there on your knees with your mouth open…

Every retard in the country has an entire team of government support workers.  People in comas have teams of people looking after them and they haven’t had brain activity in years.  Who supports me?  I don’t need to be carried for life–I just need a start…or a teammate.

Almost everyone believes in love.  No one believes in loving.

“Suck it up princess!”

Yeah thanks.  So I get that this is all a game without rules.  Fuck everybody. I realize it’s about what you take.  I get it.  Lie, cheat, steal, murder, die with more toys.  You made your point. Me or them, right?  Me or you?  Is that what you want?

“Get busy livin’ or get busy dying” (The Shawshank Redemption)

Okay that’s a good one.  But there’s more…

We all write our own stories with our choices.  I want to live a love story.  That’s my ambition, that’s my goal.  So how do I get from here to there? as a poor guy in Surrey without much of a social network?

When I look back at all the dates I have gone on they fall into two categories: Polite conversations between friends that go nowhere, and drunken naked gong shows that go nowhere.

I don’t like to touch people.  Well at the start at least.  I need to get drunk–like really drunk.  I can’t do it otherwise.  Experience requires me to have poor judgement for a bit.  It’s the only way I can connect.  Dating is about forming a bond–even if it is temporary.  I avoid bonds.  I need to get slammed.  And I hate drinking… And people that drink…

I wasn’t really looking forward to dating a bunch of drunk bar bitches… but I should be more sympathetic since this society has fucked them over too.  I guess it’s my turn, right?  That’s who you want me to be?

Do I sound pathetic?  Well that’s strange cause everyone I know goes through times where they feel just as lost as I do.  Where everything sucks. I know you have doubts about life and G_d and him and her.  I know you cry sometimes.  Usually its just a phase and it isn’t all that bad, and I can remind you of that when you come to me for help.  You’re allowed an occasional freak out.  I’m not?  Who are you to call me weak?

But were supposed to fake it.  Pretend we’re happy and confident and loyal and honest… Why?  So that we can go on being part of the social order.  An order of corruption and chaos, pain and suffering, waste and death.  So we can get ours.

The last few months I have been fighting the idea.  I’ve been mourning.  I was in denial.  I thought love was real.  I was angry.  I thought I deserved love.  I’m finally accepting it.  Love is a warm fuzzy feeling–a temporary high.  I’m going to struggle financially for years to come.  I’ll have a shitty job.  I’ll drive a shitty car.   I’ll be judged for it.  I’ll be dismissed.  I’ll be exploited.  I’ll be alone.  Pardon me if I’m not enthusiastic about it.

But then there’s this video…

What made that dog risk its life?  It pulled the other dog inch by inch while under mortal threat because every inch was an inch closer to life.

Is this ignorance? Did the dog just fail to see the danger?

Is it insanity?  A cognitive malfunction caused by a stress or trauma?

Is this weakness?

Is this love?

The video also makes me sad.  You see, I’m the dog that got hit.  I’ve been on that freeway for 30 years and I love dogs because I know no human would risk anything to save me.  Is that dog pathetic?  Both of them?  Would you rather be in a relationship with the people who sit and watch as the poor dog gets hit over and over again?  Why?

A handful have come to the side of the road and asked me what I could do for them if they saved me.  Everyone wishes me well.  They tell me they would help me but they “have to” go on an exotic vacation.  Some say they’ll help me tomorrow…  Some say they’ll help me once I’m at the curb.  When I get to the curb the push me back out into traffic.

The good thing about sitting here in the middle of the freeway is that I’m finally safe from the people on the curb that told me to cross the freeway.

Do You Feel Loved?

Do You Feel Loved?

A party had me on the weekend.  I didn’t go but it was at my house.  My roommate introduced me to three women and even a gay guy.  Two women just sat and stared at me briefly… before I left them as is usual.  One woman made an effort, but only to get in my pants… and if you think I am gay you don’t know me at all.

People tell me they love me all the time.  But as I look back, I find it hard to remember a single moment where I felt loved–then and still–by anyone.  There is so much betrayal, dishonesty, narcissism.

I want to be someone’s #1.  If the world was ending and you had a spaceship that could save yourself and one other, who would it be?  I am absolutely certain that there is no one on earth that would put me in that ship.  Everyone has someone else that gives them more of their childish chemical needs.

“Do you feel loved?”  Love is work.  The people who say they “love” me, always say that right before they ask for something or when they want to make me feel guilty, usually for not giving them something unreasonable.  It’s not their fault really, they just don’t know what love is because they are too busy trying to get something to make them feel better.

So no wonder I shy away from close relationships of any sort.  The chick who thinks my dick is the key to my heart made me think of this U2 song, Do You Feel Loved, and a few poignant lyrics. “And it looks like the sun / But it feels like rain / And there’s heat in the sun / To see us through the rain,”

To answer the question: “Do you feel loved?” you need to know what love is.  I am beginning to think that those that know what love is, always answer “no.”

At the songs end, I always picture two people asking each other, “Do you feel loved?” as the answer to the same question.  Do you feel loved?  Do you?

itunes: http://itunes.apple.com/ca/album/do-you-feel-loved/id377245?i=377243

Do You Feel Loved

ARTIST: U2

COMPOSER: U2

Take these hands, they’re good for nothing
You know these hands never worked a day
Take these boots they’re going nowhere
You know these boots don’t want to stray.

You got my head filled with songs
You got my shoelaces undone.
Take my shirt, go on, take it off me
You can tear it up if you can tie me down.

Do you feel loved?
Do you feel loved?
Do you feel loved?

Take the colours of my imagination
Take the scent hanging in the air
Take this tangle of a conversation
Turn it into your own prayer.
With my fingers as you want them
With my nails under your hide
With my teeth at your back
And my tongue to tell you the sweetest lies.

Do you feel loved?
Do you feel loved?
And it looks like the sun
But it feels like the rain, oh.

Love’s a bully, pushing and shoving
In the belly of a woman.
Heavy rhythm taking over
To stick together a man and a woman
Stick together man and a woman
Stick together.

Do you feel loved?
Do you feel loved?

And it looks like the sun
But it feels like rain
And there’s heat in the sun
To see us through the rain.

Do you feel loved?
Do you feel loved?
Do you feel loved?
Do you feel loved?

Lyrics Copyright U2 1997

“And it looks like the sun / But it feels like rain / And there’s heat in the sun / To see us through the rain,”

… but it feels like the rain… does anyone understand?

Vancouver 2010: The Bottom Line

At this point–the better the Olympics go–the more money our city, province, and country will have to spend as we see fit–if we work towards something positive.  I hope no one believes anyone is better off with disruptions so someone can get their beef heard.  Mooooo!  This isn’t Seattle, or the tar sands, or symbolic of anything but “Canadian” and “Vancouver”.  Happy Games : D

NO HOSPITALS ON STOLEN NATIVE LAND!

First, I would like to apologize to those people who will be offended by this post because they have an inability to face facts when they have something to gain… (Like hundreds of trillions in real estate value they didn’t work to create or develop or maintain)

No Olympics on Stolen Native Land?  Why just ‘No Olympics’?  How about ‘No Aboriginal Cultural Centers Funded by White People for the Benefit of Natives on Stolen Native Land!’?  ‘No Wind Power on Stolen Native Land!’  No Affordable Housing on Stolen Native Land!… and so on…

Secondly, FUCK YOU!  I didn’t steal shit, and you didn’t have shit stolen from you so get over it!  If someone stole from you or someone you know, you should phone the police and make a report.

No one gave me any land and I was born here too.  I’m 5th generation Canadian–do I get to sue Chinese people in Richmond for stealing my land?  No–cause I never personally owned their land.  They worked for it.  They paid the mortgage.  They own it now–fair and square.

In 1709, during a particularly brutal war of ethnic cleansing, my ancestors fled the Paletinate, also called the Pfaltz, in what is now Germany, near the current border with France, that has been fought over countless times before and since.   See my family webpage for details http://micksofmicksburg.ca/?q=european)

Can you please tell me who I can sue to get back ‘my’ land?  Or will that just open me up to being sued by people in Rome that claim all of Europe belongs to them…? but then who owned the land before the Romans…?  who owned it before them?  We have to draw the line somewhere… The whole world is the way it is because of past colonialism and their isn’t any fair way to go back to a previous state based on racism. (I don’t own my land because I am white?)

What about when one native tribe attacked and conquered another–or even enslaved another?  I know we all want to see natives as peace loving environmentalists, but that is just not the case (see the photos at the Museum of Anthropology of what natives did to forests).  Does one native group owe reparations to other natives?  Much of BC is claimed by rival bands…

Hopefully you can see how absurd and selfish the idea of anything being stolen from the aboriginals that live in BC today.  (Though, there are many injustices faced by natives today from racism).  But that has nothing to do with who land belongs to.

As someone who was born into a less than ideal situation, when it comes to family, finances and culture (Western culture sucks) I can assure you that moving past blame is the only way to freedom and happiness.  So unless someone can prove they are 200 years old, let’s move on and find a way for the people of Vancouver, British Columbia, Canada and the world to benefit from the Olympics.

And if you still think that all of BC is stolen land–put your money where your mouth is and get the fuck out, you hypocritical thief! lmao!

Bottom line:  In order for something to be stolen from you–you have to own it.  You have to be alive to own something.  So if you weren’t born before it was stolen–it wasn’t stolen from you and you have no personal claim to it.  (And it is racist to say your race owns it.)

Quick Sexism Test

Which of the following statements are sexist?

“All the evil in the world is caused by women.”

“All wars are caused by men.”

“Women have no place in politics because they would start wars when they menstruate.”

“Men are stronger than women.”

“On average, men are usually physically stronger than women.”

“One of the causes of violence is a culture that teaches men that dominance is natural and preferable.”

“One of the causes of violence is a culture that teaches people that dominance is natural and preferable.”

“When a couple becomes physically violent, the woman is always to blame.”

“When a couple becomes physically violent, the man is always to blame.”

Answers:

First, this is a difficult test.  It is aimed at so-called “feminists” who want more for women, which should not be confused with real feminists that work towards equality for men and women.  Some of the questions are “trick questions” deigned to demonstrate the difference between those that attempt to gain from injustice, and those that oppose injustice without prejudice.  I hope you do not get caught up in the arguments of the second wave of feminism that teaches prejudice, stereotypes, segregation (“Sisterhood”), inequality and double standards.

“All the evil in the world is caused by women.” Sexist.  It is a ridiculous statement.

“All wars are caused by men.”  Sexist.  First you would have to list every war, which is impossible, as history is incomplete.  So no one can make this claim with certainty, and this is therefor prejudicial.  Also, I know men that are constantly pressured into things they don’t want to do by their aggressive controlling female partners.  This statement is not factual.  Politics, economics ad relationships are too complex to make any statement beginning with “All wars…” a statement worth listening to.

“Women have no place in politics because they would start wars when they menstruate.”  Sexist.  All women (or men) are not responsible for the behavior of one.  The rest is irrelevant.

“Men are stronger than women.”  Sexist.  Not all men–not all women.  Prejudicial stereotype.

“On average, men are usually physically stronger than women.”  Not sexist.  A true statement that acknowledges in its context that it is a stereotype and not true in all cases.

“One of the causes of violence is a culture that teaches men that dominance is natural and preferable.”  Sexist. See the next answer.

“One of the causes of violence is a culture that teaches people that dominance is natural and preferable.”  Not sexist.  Gender neutral.  (“Men” switched with “people”)

“When a couple becomes physically violent, the woman is always to blame.”  Sexist.  See next answer.

“When a couple becomes physically violent, the man is always to blame.”  Sexist. The dynamics of an individual relationship and incident are too complex to use such generalities.  Who hit who?  Did you automatically assumes the man hit the woman? (sexist)   What if they are both men?  Both women? What if the woman is the abusive one?  What if they are both violent?  “Society” and “men” are not to blame for the actions of one or both.

How did you score?

1-3 /7   You are a sexist.  Sorry.  You can’t seem to see people as individuals and have some irrational or false beliefs about the roles of men and women in society.

4-5 /7  You are still a little sexist, most likely because of cultural or personal influences, but you can usually be fair

6-7 /7 – You are not a sexist.  You apply logic without prejudice, seeing men and women as equally capable of making their own good or bad decisions.